Thirty: A Reflection

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Boy, has it been a looong time since I posted anything here. Over a year! Oh, my poor, neglected blog!

But hey, I've been busy. Like, really, REALLY busy. I've written oodles of short stories, had one accepted into an anthology, finished writing one novel, started writing another one, sent that second one off to my editor, and had roughly five bajillion author events so new readers can enjoy my books.

It's been fun!

Want to know what else is fun? On Thursday, March 28, I turn 30 years old. Actually, it's a bit terrifying, as time has been flying by way too quickly, and I'd just like it to slow down for a while. (Is that too much to ask for?)

Looking back at my twenties, I can see they were all about change. Slow change, but change nevertheless. In some ways, I feel like a butterfly unfurling its new wings as it emerges from its cocoon, feeling the sunlight it hasn't seen since it was a wee caterpillar.

That may sound cheesy, but it's true. When I turned 20, ten years ago now, I was on antidepressants and not all that happy about life due to crippling anxiety that left me completely useless. When a painful, personal tragedy struck me at the age of 21, I sank into a deep melancholy that produced some awfully dark writing on my part.

They say that time heals all wounds, but I'm not entirely sure I believe that. It just makes the wounds farther away than they used to be, enabling me to look at them more objectively. Instead of moping about things I can't change because they already happened, I can look back and say, "That was a very sad thing that happened, but it's done now, and I need to focus on other, more pertinent things before my entire life passes me by."

I don't know if that's a healthy coping mechanism or not. I just make things up as I go.

I feel a lot happier now. I've started writing more comedy and fewer bloodbaths, but I haven't published any of that yet. It's such an enjoyable change of pace, making flat-Earthers get abducted by aliens and distant human outposts get invaded by sentient Canadian geese in spacesuits. (You will read about these things eventually. Have patience, young padawan.)

What else has happened or changed over the past ten years?

I finally got a smartphone.

I stopped being an asshole, mostly.

I adopted a bunch of cats.

I no longer seize up with terror when I pick up the phone. Yay phone calls!

I feel confident and ready to take over the world.

I've improved my eating habits, ditching the chips and alcohol for food that contains actual nutrients. You have no idea what a difference this has made.

In all, I have to say my 20s ended up being mostly good.

And now, onward to my 30s!